Parental Advisory

I have been doing pretty much OK since Thanksgiving but this afternoon, after the local public radio station ran the umpty-ninth spin of some chesty alto performing “O Thou That Tellest Good Tidings To Zion,” I snapped.

(Disclaimer: I have actually performed this *&%$&#! number. And been paid ten dollars for it, in nineteen eighty something.)

Nothing else in the calendar would be acceptable as the excuse for all these foghorning Katisha runners-up and jingly dingly Leroy Anderson medleys and Top-Fortyish repetitions of “Adeste Fideles.” Get thee up into the high mountain, I say.  All of you. And don’t come down. Especially the guy over there who hits the top note in Adolphe Adam’s Cantique de Noel.

(OK, I know, Pavarotti is dead, and de mortuus nil nisi yada yada but — 1:56. Is that a sound you want to hear? Really?)

So now I am humming this and remain likely to continue till December 26.

Warning: extreme, gratuitous, juvenile crudity

(Except, of course, for you, Az, because those elves are too surreal for words.)

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13 thoughts on “Parental Advisory

  1. What a jolly song … I do believe it’s revived my excitement.

    There’s a story doing the rounds over here at the moment about a little girl who’s threatened to kill Santa and his reindeer and feed them all to the poor if she doesn’t get what she wants for Christmas – hilarious.

  2. I’ve been playing my Christmas songs non-stop on my iPod deck since last week. I LOVE IT. And I love the tacky stuff I hear when I go to the Corte Inglés, and I love hearing the Spanish carols when I’m out and about, and I LOVE IT ALL.

    So there you grinchy- grinch! So much depends on how you look at things.

    And yeah! Aren’t my dancing and singing cat elves the best?? I did it all in a hurry this year, so cropping wasn’t as refined as in other years (ha!), but cats still look like aliens so all is good. And… it made you smile, didn’t it?

    Merry Christmas! 🙂

  3. In 1978 Pavarotti still had a voice and he must have filled Notre-Dame Basilica, where that video was shot, in Montreal, all the way to the rafters and with three balconies they are high.
    As for the 13 year old urchin she is part of a fringe adolescent group that we have to watch very carefully.

    • Pavarotti was a phenomenon, but he was a bit like Stephen King who admitted baldly that when he could not succeed in creating a horrific effect in his fiction, he would “go for the gross-out.” Pavarotti didn’t have the sonority in the upper registers to sustain a forte, but he was not afraid to bawl if that was what it took to hold the note, and it usually carried him through with the audience.

      I like bass baritones.

  4. I love extreme, gratuitous, juvenile crudity! Especially this time of year. If you want more, we always listen to SomaFM Xmas in Frisco Internet radio. A lot of ‘normal’ songs, but unique versions – and loads of the EGJC too 🙂

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