The Emperor Augustus was, reputedly, a man addicted to quaint sayings, and I believe Tacitus cites the expression “quicker than boiled asparagus.” Asparagus, of course, requires nothing more than to be lightly blanched or steamed; you sort of wave it at the heat source. Best vegetable on the planet.
I had a cat who doted on bits of asparagus, and I vaguely remember mentioning that at Azahar’s blog, and she has remembered. Quicker than boiled asparagus, now, get your buns over there and behold two of the world’s most adorable and loudly-purring cats enjoying their wholesome snack. Warning: susceptible folk will be incapacitated by awwww.