It is painting week at the House of Sled (before and after pictures going up soon) and I almost forgot it was also the last week of the month. Nursemyra’s tradition of T-shirt Friday is a favorite of mine, and I had this one all set aside.
The weapon you see held in my right hand is a Hitachi Twin Head Massager, no longer available because of some complications with the companies that manufactured the patented twin motors. I originally bought one from the dazzling Momentum 98 supplier, previously recommended in these pages as an unparalleled purveyor of high-end massage gadgets, clunky Web commerce design, and enchanting New Age sensibilities.
However, as with all specialty items and small providers, sometimes there is an out of stock problem, and even before they stopped making these things, I had to go questing occasionally on behalf of my clients, who would get a load of the deep-throated vibrations of this thing wrapped around their neck or tennis elbow — kind of like a whale purr — and demand to know where they could buy one.
One year Momentum was out for a while, I forget when, and an Internet search turned up an available supply at Blowfish.com, “Good Products for Great Sex,” purveyors of fine sex products on the Internet since 1995, as I recall one of their other claims.
This was difficult for some of my clients, who balked at mail ordering from a business of this nature, to wrap their minds around. How this two-fisted pummeling device would function as a sex toy in anyone’s repertory was difficult for me to wrap my mind around.
Whatever, I found myself placing a mass order one Christmas with a company whose receipt said Good Products For Great Sex and plunking the half-grand total right onto my schedule C. If anyone ever questions this, I think all I have to do is exhibit the device invoiced. Most of what Blowfish sells is, as they say, the finest of its kind and visibly destined for its intended use, but you’d have to be like the “young girl from Mobile with the snatch made of Bessemer steel” to actually do something lubricious with that. On the other hand, it will totally whap your migraine.
The T-shirt, of course, was irresistible.